We teach kids to fear animals like rats, snakes, spiders, etc. that are harmless 99% of the time but do we ever warn them about the real danger
WHY DOES IT HAVE TEETH ON ITS TONGUE
I am a gooseologist and I can tell you that geese live on a healthy diet of children’s souls which can only be properly chewed with unholy tongue teeth
Guys who try to use the “Are you on your period?” as way to end an argument always amuse me. Because it gives me the excuse to lean in close and whisper.
“I started my day by waking up in a pool of my own blood. Is that how you’d like me to end yours?”
omfg this is great
New favorite comeback.
Favourite Australian saying: “have a good one”. Have a good what? We’ll never tell. You’ll never know Australian secrets.
who’s gonna take the 82 hour trip down to no where land to tell these people half the english speaking world uses their apparently exclusive phrases
why do people have quiet respectful funerals when i die i want my ashes mixed with glitter and packed tightly into a coffin and then they blow up the coffin with explosives so glitter rains down on the guests while blasting “thanks for the memories” by fall out boy
jesus god almighty